Sunday, October 28, 2007

Heidi Klum -- Size Queen!


"I know a lot of people talk about Seal's bicycle shorts, but it is the truth! That is what he was wearing the first time I met him and I was overwhelmed."

Heidi Klum gushed about Seal's anatomical gifts on Oprah. "When I saw him, I was like, wow! He is different and so tall and dark and just handsome. I saw the package – and I mean the whole package, literally. I was like, 'That is a man.'"

On retrospect, she's glad she 'seized' ummmm, the moment! "I just think if you have an emotion and you let that go that moment might pass," she said. "If you don't open the door for the person to come in, it would have just been like, 'Nice to meet you goodbye.'"

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Make me famous on MYSPACE!





Calling all sluts sissies slaves losers wimps underhung & hungover!!!

Join my MYSPACE page. Send me a friends request. Identify yourself so I know who you are on Niteflirt.

My page is under construction, but will have more going on shortly....Click my link below....

Find me on MySpace and be my friend!

Jerk-Off Pet Strikes Again!


My jerk-off pet likes to find exciting and kinky places to jerk off for me. Perhaps you remember an earlier post where he jerked off on a ski lift, without getting frostbite! Well his latest spurt was at a theme park, on a ride. He had an audience (his 'date' who he probably scared away due to his tater tot size).

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Stubby's Story -- Part II of IV

PART TWO -------The night was sweltering hot, humid, with everyone sweating in their cots trying to sleep. Mixed music from a couple places could barely be heard in our tent drifting through the dense foliage of the woods. Soon after dark I left the tent for my excursion to the girls’ tent, having traced out a curved path in my mind through the woods to circle around the parents camp area. It was so warm I was wearing just a tee shirt, tennis shorts, and sneakers, and still I was sweating, my hot heavy balls dangling low. I was so excited by the risk I was taking.

It took awhile, but in the dark I zeroed in on a tent that seemed very active. All the other tents within sight were dark, probably empty. Music was rolling out of the well light interior of the tent into the woods and there was the sound of many female voices having great fun. My path had taken me toward the back of the tent’s glowing canvas fabric. Shadows of girls move on the canvas. It just so happened that this tent had some of the fabric ripped in the back so the canvas flap hung down exposing a squarish hole about 18 inches across and a couple feet off the ground. I made my way to that hole and from a few feet away peered inside.

Wow! I almost blurted out. I could only see a patch of the inside, but the girls were dancing and singing to the music around the center of the large tent in their panties and bras, and some had taken their bras off! Stephanie, sans her glasses and bra, was really wild. I had an instant hard-on, and just watched in pure joy for what seemed like heavenly hours. Then I had a wicked thought.

I approached the tent, turned around, dropped my shorts and stuck my big sweaty ass up to the hole of the tent and stuck my ass inside. It was a tight fit but my ass when in, and I waited for a reaction. I did not wait long. Inside the girls started screaming and squealing in excitement, so loud! I waited a couple seconds then took off into the woods, pulling my shorts back up, and made my way back to my tent in record time without bashing into too many trees.

The next day, talking with Stephanie, she told me that someone had mooned them, to their great joy. They screamed so loud their parents came over to check the noise out. The girls told them they had seen a skunk, and all was forgotten by the parents who warily made their way back to their camp area looking for the little varmint. I was in the clear. I did not tell Stephanie what I had done and just enjoyed her story about the incident and what the girls said about that ass. By the time we parted, after several kisses and fondling, I decided to pay another visit to their tent that night. She didn’t mention they were dancing around half naked.

So that evening I retraced my route to their tent, dress like the night before. It was like deja vue, the night so hot and humid, as the music, dancing and singing were emanating from the tent. I peered in and watched. This time they were all bra-less, their panties so colorful, and I saw some beer cans in the hands. Little did I know they were reenacting the previous night in the hopes my ass would return. They were ready for me.

Through the hole in the back of their tent, I watched with lusty joy as the girls danced and sang to the music on the radio, their varied breasts bobbing and bouncing about. Stephanie’s boobs were fantastic! My cock was rock hard! I got my horny nerve up and stepped over to the tent, dropped my sweaty shorts and stuck my bare ass into the hole and inside. I waited and longed for their loud reaction.

Several seconds passed and they had not stop their singing and dancing about on the wood floor. Maybe they had not seen me, I thought, and pushed my ass even further into the hole, stretching the canvas tight. I pushed so far I could feel my big, hot, sweaty balls slip past the canvas wall and into the tent. I could feel them inside the tent hanging heavy and very low, brushing against the inside canvas, my rigid cock throbbing on the outside of the tent. Several more seconds passed and nothing changed from inside the tent.

Then my memory of the moment stopped with a short, sharp flash of pain, and I vaguely remember falling to the dark earth. I learned later what happened in those few moments.

Tom from Myspace needs to be my bitch!



OK we all know Tom, the geeky guy who everyone gets as their first friend when they sign up on Myspace. Supposedly Tom is real, and is one of the dotcomboys who made big bank when Myspace was bought out for billions. So yes, it would be fun to have Tom as my rich little bitchboy. Just looking at Tom, I think he probably wanks it too much, spends hours surfing internet porn, and really needs a bossy girl to keep him under her thumb. So Tom, if you should happen to read my little blog entry, and it made your lil peen hard, it's playtime!

Friday, October 12, 2007

Stubby's Story Part I of IV

"A Girl, A Bat, and a Life of Unexpected Pleasures"

A true story by 'John Ridgeling'

When I was in high school I thought my small cock would grow much bigger as I became a man. Who knew the man would get much, much bigger and my cock would stay the same baby length and just get stubbier. Still, I had a big set of hanging balls that, in the right situations, I loved to expose to as many of those wonderful, curious girls that I could. They always seemed to enjoy the surprise and shock of seeing my small cock and big dangling balls! Then I met Stephanie at summer camp and she would change my life with women forever. That summer in the woods there were a large group of scouts, parents, and a group of six teen angels, daughters of the parents. The girls had one large wall tent, one among dozens of tents throughout the large, woodsy camp. I went to school with most of the girls, including Stephanie, who I had my eye on, and she on me. We all spent a week at the camp that summer in Maryland, I with the boy scout group, and the six girls, well, on their own as their parents would not leave them home. Those six girls teased the scouts every chance they could get. The girls tent was well away from the scouts group of tents, and a decent distance away from the parents cottages and tents. The girls had pretty much isolated themselves from everyone, for their own lusty reasons. My schoolmate Stephanie and I had met a few times during the week when I could get away from scouting rituals, and we become an item. She was tall with long blonde hair, glasses, and a great looking body. That week, she and I kissed for the first time, several times. She even let me fondle her gorgeous breasts about mid-week, near the camps chow hall one evening. Toward the end of the week I was real horny and decided to pay her a visit one night, without telling her.
END OF PART ONE

Speaking of Sex Dolls....

Sex fiend Charlie Sheen had an expensive latex friend (from realdoll.com) but supposedly dismembered and dumped the $6,000 doll after he was ridiculed for suggesting to some paid pussies that they all have group sex with dolly.

“They couldn't stop laughing at him,” the source told the Daily News. “Charlie got so mad that he ran the girls out of his house. Then he took a meat cleaver and chopped one of the doll's hands off. He and his bodyguard tried to dispose of it, like it was a real body. They wrapped it in a blanket and drove around in the middle of the night till they found a dumpster.”

Monday, October 08, 2007

"Looking for stunningly gorgeous fuckdoll"



Annoying sleaze contacts me. Nevermind that I'm not an escort, since he's new to Niteflirt, he probably doesn't realize this isn't Eros-guide. His cut&paste email:

I travel alot. I want a fuckdoll to show up to my hotel. You be there to fuck. Try not to talk unless you're good at talking dirty. Let's have some NSA fun. No encumbrances.

My response:

Today is your lucky day. You contacted the right girl even tho you didn't read my listings. Do I have a fuckdoll for you.

Fuck Doll


I like the Jesse Jane model myself. It has hair you can pull. So bring your fuckdoll to a hotel room and blow it up, don't forget your bicycle pump! I'll show up at your hotel room with one of my friends. We'll set you back several thousand to watch you fuck your dolly. If you're lucky, we'll laugh and cheer you on!

Expect us to drink room service champagne and eat the $20 jar of macadamia nuts from the mini-bar. Maybe we'll take digital pictures so you can always remember how much fun it was to stick your dickie into the fuckdoll's holes. You asked for NSA and no encumbrances, what better fuckdoll than one you can throw away when you're done!

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Questions for Sara (submitted by a blog reader)

1.Do you have a real boyfriend (not a fag like me) or is Nicole your primary lover?

Nicole is my primary female 'pussy pal'. I do have 'service males' with big cocks who take care of my 'fucking' needs. Right now I don't have time to give a full-time boyfriend, meaning one who would want a romantic, intimate, emotional connection to me. I'm not really into mushy shit anyway. I like sex, I love sex! Hot sex with hot girls or big cocks.

2.What do you look for when you or Nicole when pick a black lover for the night? What attracts you to him?

Well we've actually shared the same BBC. We want them hot, Kanye West looking, with attitude and a big cock. And 'for the night' is the operative word, we are basically using BBC as a supersized sex toy for our pussies.

3. Would you like to see a beachclub for whitegirls and their black lovers only and the only white guys that are their are dressed up as frenchmaids to better serve you both? Could Nicole dig that?

I think that would be an awesome club in Jamaica. Call it Club Zebra haha. Nicole would definitely get into it. I've heard there are some private clubs like this, but haven't been able to confirm.


4. Do you two like to see whiteboys humiliated by your black lovers?

Yes, inferior little clittie-dicked whiteboys need to be put in their place!!!!
But we don't believe black is necessarily better than white. There are large white and Latino cocks, they're just more difficult to find. Size Queens are looking for size regardless of color. Black is just a different flavor or should I say 'flava'.

5. With your looks and slim body.I'm surprise you are not a world class model? You can easily have that wristwatch cock fireman in your xtube video instead of talking to silly faggots like me. What is it that attracts you to us sissy gayboys when you can have all the straight hunky handsome men you want?

Alpha females such as myself and my girlfriends keep all men on their proper side of the line in the sand. Fuckable vs. unfuckable. Sissy gayboys are like toys to us. We play with them and then we toss them aside. Or we make them give us $$$. Do you think the fireman has any $$$? Doubtful....

As for modeling, I'm too short to be world class, I have done modeling down here in Miami and occasionally pick up a gig, but as I've blogged before, models at the level at which I model get taken advantage of, especially when desperate for money. Photographers can be sleazy pimps, the only difference is they're holding cameras.

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

I am not MISTRESS McFETISH!!



The fetishists have crawled into my inbox realm with their needy little fantasies hoping I will so indulge them. No, there won't be kissing of my tootsie toes for free, nor will my 'oldest smelliest heels' that 'Mistress was probably going to throw out anyway' find their way to the little sniffy's mailbox in Stinkweedville, nor will there be pissy panties going out in a ziploc nor will my apartment be cleaned for 4 hours while I sit around and talk on the phone with my girlfriends while ignoring the sissy French maid.

Pay to play or go away!

Overheard at the Club: Riding Shotgun

(3 wiggas acting badazz)

Oh yeah that bitch, she wanted me to give up the front seat, wanted me to ride in the back y'all

So what did you do?

I told that bitch where to sit!

(High 5's)

She got in the back, like a good bitch.

Dominant vs. Dominate

Learn how to use them correctly!

One of my pet peeves is when slaves do not use these words in their proper context.

If you write me an email which states:

'Mistress I need to be controlled by a dominate woman like you'

You will be iGGied.

Actually if I were right there in your mousehole, I would make you take a pad and pen and write 100 times:

Mistress I need to be controlled by a DOMINANT woman like you

A better choice would yield:

Mistress I need to be controlled by a DOMINANT woman

'like you' reduces the power of the statement

Byebye Jackoff Video!!!


OK I think you little gayboys have had enough gaytime with the firehose video. I received more emails talking about this posting than any other, so many that the # of emails exceeded the Stinkbob and Teen Cuckoldress postings. This is how I know most of you lust for cock.

Here's another biggie sized boingboing for you to drool over, altho something tells me this one has been photoshopped. Why? Because it's mounted on such a pathetic whiteboy chassis....