I finally found a parking space without paying because it's free at nite time in Montreal (so why did I get another parking ticket? oh I must have been near a hydrant) So went down the block off of St. Catherine where the Dark Montreal Meat club is. I had to admit I was little scared. The street was dark, lonely, windy, cold and deserted .What girl would come out on a night like this on these unsafe streets to go to the male strip club? I walk down the block and back. I thought I must be on the wrong block. I look at my flier and it said I was not. After worrying about being mugged I looked to the left of me and it had a drawing on the door that looked like a big penis. I thought this got to be it. I must have passed this door twice. I rang the bell and was let in.
I could not believe all the beautiful young girls in the club. What a welcome sight. According to the initials on their sweaters a big group of them came from Montreal University. I bought myself a drink, turned and saw a wimpy little white boy (like the one who passed out the flier on the corner) dancing on stage only to be replaced by another wimpy skinny dancing whiteboy. I came here for this(?) I thought.... To make matters worse, there were a couple of tv screens up on the sides of the stage playing gay porn, two wimpy naked whiteboys giving each other a 69. Now I thought it was cool last nite at the female strip club when their tv show featured two naked girls making out. But to watch boys doing on the screen with a large group of girls there was a little humiliating. After watching a few more boring dancers I realized that they where the same guys on the t.v. screen that made this video.The girls looked a little bored as they were chatting away while drinking and smoking. I also noticed that the waiters were also skinny whiteboys looking and moving awfully faggish. Wearing skimpy G-srings to cover their tiny penises.
I asked the bartender (another skinny whiteboy) "What gives." "How can these wimpy whiteboys hold the attention of all these pretty white girls?" He laughed and said "Do you honestly think they are staying here for them?" I shrugged. "Do you see any of them get tipped yet?" "No." "These whiteboys are strictly a cheap warm-up for the main attraction tonight at eleven." I said what main attraction? The white bartender looked me square in the eye and said, "Do I have to spell it out for you. Don't you know whiteboys have been replaced?" "What do mean by replaced?" I said, a little confused. "Good god man have you been living in the sticks? I mean replaced like the dvd replaced the vhs tapes. Like the ipod replaced the walkman replaced the boombox. Like the cellphone replace rotary phones. Do you get the picture now?" "Yes I get the picture now. Ummm but who replace us?" I said rather dumb-like. He said
"Why it's those big black guys from Jamaica who are hung like a horse and are now coming in droves and making us white bois look like little sissy girlie-men. We're afraid that soon are little white manly asses will be kicked out. If our white boss lady gets more complaints that the girls are getting sick of us. Each day more of them want real men. Not a cheap white imitation of a man. Why do you think so many of us white dudes are turning gay in a big way?" "Why?" "Because white pussy is now strictly off limits to us. More and more white girls prefer black and may only keep us around for a joke, a few laughs like a homo show here, and of course for money." I said "Now I get you." I begin to see the big picture. Why the Jamaican guys come all the way up here where it's freezing cold. I guess it goes back to the French colonies of the West Indies.
I did a shot of Jack at the bar and made my way to the Men's Room. Inside the stall I took off my underwear and pulled a white thong out of my backpack that said "BLACK COCK ONLY". (No shit) I put on my thongs, crossed my heart and went back out to try to fit in. by Gaywayne
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